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Hax: Wife’s past affairs become a problem

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Q I am a married man and father of one beautiful 3-year-old boy. For Christmas my wife and I got a new computer to share, set up with her email account. So, after Christmas I notice an email in my wife’s “sent” box. Apparently in September she had responded to a cheater’s ad in Craigslist. She had coffee with this man. Nothing else because luckily he was older than he let on.

I’m completely devastated by this. My wife feels terrible and says she loves me and wants to stay with me. I very much love her too. And I take responsibility for the things I did to drive her to do something like that.

But I can’t stop thinking about this. The words in the email she wrote this man really hurt me deeply. And I know her past affairs shouldn’t matter but, before she met me, she would exclusively date married men. This always bothered me because I think it shows a lack of character. But over our seven years together I’ve managed to put those feelings aside.

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Bless your heart
Bless your heart